But I'm not this big majestic being, I'm me, pathetically heart broken after this long now, struggling to get up and get on with it. I am though, I am getting up and getting on with it. I've been more busy now than I've ever been in my life and pain ain't fading! I'm trying everything here, I've tried getting on with it, tried taking a day to myself today, well it's not going so well either. I'm mad and frustrated that it's taking so long. I've no reason to love him anymore. Okay, message to my heart: He's gone, loving him will bring nothing benificial to you or him. Why can't you understand that? He never nourished you or gave you security, it's up to you to give yourself that. Loving him just seems to be a bad thing for both of you, and everyone around you.
I don't know if the weird feeling in my chest is a sign that I'm doing something wrong or if it's just normal pain that needs to heal. Usually, I would follow my heart. Last time I did that and went back to him, I followed it into a venus fly trap. I just ended up more hurt than ever, and that was within a day. I literally just want to crawl under the blanket and sleep forever and ignore the feeling. I've lost the love of my life, or just found out he didn't love me so much, it's just, all a mess. Advice, nothing works. I'm sorry to say it but, it never does. I can try and follow it but, it doesn't make the pain any less. The best advice is, life goes on. And you just have to go on with it, no matter how you're feeling. When you accept the cycle of life into your life, your pain can go with the cycle from hurt to happiness. I wish my cycle would hurry up and kick in!









--
- tn.
--
'I now release the need to experience this life lesson. I extract whatever teachings I need to discover, and I move on to a life of harmonious and peaceful actions.'
--
R.I.P
Michael Jackson
Forever Remembered
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
--
'I now release the need to experience this life lesson. I extract whatever teachings I need to discover, and I move on to a life of harmonious and peaceful actions.'
--
R.I.P
Michael Jackson
Forever Remembered
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
I have been following your journals, and just wanted to say, that I think its just fine to express yourself about the troubles in your life. I think it's very healthy.
Maybe you can find a way to do it without it being quite so obvious about whom you are speaking. Maybe there is a compromise.
I hate for you to lose your expressive outlet. People close to us often don't to hear our troubles, nor to be identified as part of them. But gosh we have to have somebody to talk to, even if its our keyboard and journal!
Lol...
Wink...
Good luck-
-Merton
--
"Let all aspects of ourselves be integrated within us!" -Merton Parrish
--
'I now release the need to experience this life lesson. I extract whatever teachings I need to discover, and I move on to a life of harmonious and peaceful actions.'
--
"Let all aspects of ourselves be integrated within us!" -Merton Parrish
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